“Mmm-she's dishy!”
“Well, all I have to do is get dad's permission and we start out on Friday in Stella's car. A friend of hers is going abroad for a few months and is letting her use a bungalow she has there whenever she wants-it has a private beach, too.”
“Golly! If the weather holds up. I'll be able to show a South of France tan at school!”
“Off to bed with you, then-only one day to wait.”
“Oh, you're a darling, mummy!” She hugged me tightly, and once again I had that queer little tug as she kissed me, her lips a little too lingering. I shrugged it off, making a mental note to watch her closely in the next holidays; she was beginning to feel sex stirring in her body, without knowing what the sensations meant, and I didn't want it led into the wrong channels, or, as Phil put it-“straddled across a motor-bike with her drawers off!”
I took a cup of cocoa in to Phil and decided to broach the Bridlington excursion right away. I told him.
“I was telling Stella that Jane hadn't had a holiday this year and she suggested we give her a treat. I told Jane and, of course, she's all for it.”
“The 'we' being yourself and Stella, eh?”
“Well, as a matter of fact, you were invited as well,” I lied, “but I said you would be too busy. Of course, the invitation is still open.” I crossed my fingers behind my back.
“That so? Well, of course, I am too busy-far too busy, unfortunately. Take Jane by all means.”
I breathed out and went to the door. I heard him clear his throat and turned.
“But-uh-watch yourself with that Stella — something tells me she'd just love to get you into bed with her!”
I felt my face flame hotly, and prayed he didn't notice the guilty look I must have shown. Even so, I had to get to the bottom of it.
“Why do you keep saying things like that about her? I haven't noticed any mannishness in her-I think she is extremely feminine.”
“Well, why hasn't she got herself a man, then?”
“Maybe she has-how do you know?”
“You're her friend-she would have told you by now. That's just the point, Rita; she hasn't. She is an attractive, feminine woman and very well off into the bargain-she could take her pick. She has a car, money, her own house and what does she do? Lives by herself and has just one friend-you. Sure-I like her well enough-she's good-looking and intelligent, but there's something peculiar somewhere and you might, you just might, be weak enough to let her have what she wanted — even if only to avoid hurting her feelings. Then, who knows — you might like it, which leaves me with a lesbian wife on my hands!”
I stood looking at him, trying to think of something to say. He was getting far too close to the truth: I mustn't underrate his intelligence. Panic flared briefly as the possibility occurred to me of his knowing already — or at least guessing-and this was by way of warning me off tactfully, without bringing things out into the open. But no-that wasn't Phil's way; he would have said so right out. I pretended anger.
“I'm sorry you feel that way about her; sorry you have such a horribly twisted outlook on life. So, according to you, any woman who isn't married is a lesbian — that right?”
“When they get to her age-what is she, thirty-three, thirty-four? — with her looks and possessions, I say there must be something funny somewhere; not even a man-friend in tow.”
“She may have had a disappointment in her life-something she wouldn't even tell me about. Thought of that?”
“I have and I'm allowing it as an outside possibility.” He grinned, then. “So I'm okaying the Bridlington trip.”
I smiled back, content to drop the matter.
“Well, I'm off to bed now-coming up?”
“No-I'll be a while yet. You go ahead.”
As I undressed for bed, I wondered how it was all going to end. Phil already suspected Stella of being what she was; I knew he didn't suspect me, but that was the logical progression. Would I be able to go on like this, giving myself to Stella without Phil eventually finding out? I thought over my actions since intimacy had begun between Stella and I. Had I acted in the same way as I had when we were just ordinarily friendly? I thought so. Had Stella? I wasn't sure-it was only since we had started our lesbian affaire that Phil had mentioned his suspicions. Had she started looking at me in a different way when she was here? Maybe I ought to tell her. But how could I, without telling her what Phil thought? No, that would only upset her.
I would have to be very careful if I wanted our relationship to continue-and I had to be honest with myself and admit that I did. I must guard against becoming careless with familiarity.
Firstly-where did Stella and I make love? Up to now, at her place; no real problem that in itself, as Phil was unlikely to break the door down. Must remember to be careful of windows, especially downstairs. Where else? Rose's flat. No problem, either. That would only be on the odd occasion and again it would be behind a locked door, with the added protection of my husband not knowing even of its existence.
The bungalow at Bridlington. Jane would be the only danger there-we would have to be extremely careful while we were there; I hoped the doors had keys to the locks. What else? It would certainly be awkward if I came home me night after being with Stella — especially if we'd let ourselves go-and found that Phil wanted me that night; I remembered the frantic business of working myself up the previous night. No-I should definitely have to work something out from that angle.
I was getting so crazily mixed-up. I knew I still loved Phil-even enjoyed sexual intercourse with him. I also loved Stella-perhaps in a different way-and I certainly enjoyed sexual intercourse with her-or whatever they called it between two women!
I slipped off my panties and examined them; as I thought they were damp. Bringing Stella on to her climax had roused me again. It was a warm night, so I crawled nude between the sheets-if Phil came up and decided he wanted me again, he could have me!
I must have fallen asleep fairly quickly; I don't remember Phil coming to bed.
CHAPTER FIVE
I awoke with cool air fanning my naked body. Drowsily, I opened my eyes, taking a time to focus on what was going on.
“Phil! What on earth are you up to? Oh-I see! Like that, is it?”' I squirmed on to my back to look up at him-also to give him a better view of me!
He had pulled the covers right back and was kneeling beside me, gazing at me, his cock as big and hard as I had seen it.
“What time is it?”
“Eight o'clock-I must be away, soon.”
I smiled and reached out to touch his enormous erection, all hot and stiff. I closed my hand around it, feeling it throb.
“Poor old thing-in a bad way, aren't we?” I twisted bent and kissed the tip, felt it warm against my lips; wanted more. I opened my mouth and accepted the bared glans, heard his breath hiss. I gave it a quick suck and looked up at him.
“You like that, don't you, darling?”
“It's marvellous! Do some more!”
I bent my head again and got my lips round it: bent lower, letting the warm shaft glide in until it filled my mouth. Then I moved my head up and down on him, giving him little sucks and running my tongue over the knob, the way he liked it.