“Holy kamoly. You look horrible. Why didn’t you call me? I was-”
He wasn’t coherent. Wasn’t going to be coherent again. Maybe ever. So he just blurted out what he needed to say. “I wasn’t trying to get you drunk.”
“I never thought you were.”
“I didn’t mean to be so…physical.”
“Of course you did. That’s you. You’ll always be more fantastic with action, especially that action-than talk. Chitchat isn’t your thing. No sweat.” She closed the door and took a long gander at his living area. “You are such a dimwit. Why didn’t you tell me you were in trouble?” Then she took an even longer gander at him. “You haven’t shaved. You look as if you haven’t slept. You look as if-”
“It’s been horrible,” he confirmed.
“Molly’s taking a nap. My mom came over to watch her for a couple hours. I needed to get out to the grocery store, and I came over to see if I could pick up anything for you two.” She raised her eyebrows. “No point in asking, I can see. It’s obvious you need everything. Let’s see how good you are at following orders.”
“What orders?”
By nightfall, Mike figured she was akin to a cyclone. They were at her house by then. The kids were in pajamas in front of the TV. Both had had oatmeal baths, rubdowns, a liberal application of calamine, then dressed in their pj’s. They’d gobbled down toasted cheese sandwiches, then lemonade, then small bowls of sorbet.
Nobody was crying. Nobody was whining. Both kids looked a pinch away from going to sleep for the night.
“I think,” Amanda said quietly, as she handed him a serious bowl of chili sprinkled with sour cream and melted cheddar, “that you and Teddy should take the spare room tonight. Molly can sleep in with me. My guess is that you really need a night’s sleep, and I can handle a round if the kids need someone in the night.”
She could handle both kids behind her back. And him. They’d stayed at his place until she’d transformed it. The dirty dishes went away. The Jell-O bowls disappeared. The heap of messy cutlery seemed to all fit in the washer. She’d stayed with Teddy while he showered and found clean clothes. Then she’d herded them to her place-kicked her mom out-and started in with the little ones. The baths, the cooking and feeding. The calm, no-nonsense orders. Even Slugger and Darling obeyed her. They were sacked out by their respective charges by the couch.
“I think that’s too much trouble for you,” he said.
“What’s the trouble? Both of us will end up losing sleep if we stay in separate houses. This way we can run relay for each other. Each get a solid stretch of sleep.”
She sounded totally reasonable, but Mike wanted time with her. Real time. Not time like this. He couldn’t guess what she was thinking or feeling-about him. About them.
But he caved about the sleepover, and when he settled Teddy in the upstairs room around eight o’clock that evening, Teddy begged him to sack out next to him. He did, for just a few minutes.
The next time he surfaced, Teddy was still sleeping soundly, and the wall clock claimed it was 6:00 a.m.
He’d slept ten solid hours.
And there was only one thing he wanted or needed-and that was to find Amanda.
Chapter Thirteen
Mike was quiet, descending the stairs, unsure if Amanda or Molly were sleeping-not wanting to wake either of them if they were still asleep. But when he glanced outside…there was a slim, white, unforgettable leg stretched out on a lawn chair.
The morning was cool, with a wispy mist dancing over the grass, hiding in and out of bushes. The sun had a beat of warmth, more promise than reality this early. She’d put a bowl of strawberries on the glass table, a carafe of coffee with a spare mug that he strongly suspected was for him. Both his dog and hers were snoozing at her feet.
She was wearing easy clothes, that kind of green she liked, in a loose, soft top paired with jeans. Her feet were bare. So was her face.
When he opened the door, she immediately looked up and smiled. Then motioned to the mug.
“I figured coffee might be the first thing you wanted.”
“That’s it,” he said firmly. “I love you forever. Don’t fight it. You’re going to have to marry me.”
“You know what? I was thinking the same thing.”
He almost sputtered on the first sip-when he was downright desperate for that caffeine. She clearly liked it that she so easily rattled him. She watched him sit in the chair next to hers, put a foot up before speaking.
“When I woke up three mornings ago,” she said quietly, “I thought…maybe you were into payback. That you were doing the same thing to me…that you believed I’d done to you.”
“Run that by me again. A little slower. A lot slower, Amanda.”
So she went slower. “The first time we made love…you thought I was doing a hit-and-run. That I was willing to sleep with you. But still keep a distance.”
He wasn’t sure what the balance was between quicksand versus honesty. So he just motioned her to go on.
“So when I woke up three mornings ago…I started worrying…at first…that you were doing just that.
Startling me with a seduction. You didn’t ask first. You just took charge.”
“Amanda-” He got it. Quicksand or not, he had to get the whole truth out there, no matter what it cost him. Too much was at stake to risk less.
“Hear me out. I figured it out, Mike. Your coming on to me took a ton of courage…just like the night I came on to you was the biggest risk I’d ever taken. I’ve been trying to be a different woman than I was before. So that first night, it wasn’t about sex. Or just about sex. It was about my being strong enough and honest enough to admit I wanted you. And to ask for what I wanted and needed, loud and strong.”
His turn then. “Three nights ago, I knew something bad had happened at the hearing. I could see it in your face, your eyes. I didn’t how to help. I just knew…I wanted you to turn to me when something bad or sad happened. No matter when or how or what it was. I hated it. That you felt so bad.”
She put down her coffee, leaned forward. She lifted her hands toward him and he took them. Their knees touched. Their palms nested together. She said carefully, “Mike. I don’t want to be a leaner. Or a needer.”
“I know that bugs you. But I don’t see it. I never saw it. You’re smart. You’re a general and a diplomat in a crisis. You’re the best mom on the planet. When a situation’s tough, you don’t run, you dive in-wherever, whenever. Do whatever it takes.”
She frowned, as if it never occurred to her that someone would see her that way. “I was just raised…so helpless.”
“That may be true, Red. But that’s not character. It’s just circumstance. A person doesn’t start out the first day of medical school doing brain surgery. It takes some time and practice.”
“You respected that before I did.”
He hesitated, long and hard. Reached for more coffee. Still hesitated. Her eyes were on his face, her expression patient, waiting. Apparently she wanted him to lay out something tough. Offhand, he couldn’t think of any way to avoid it-particularly if he wanted to win her. And he wanted that more than life.
“Okay…from my side of the fence now…I let something loose the other night.”
“I know. You shared some of your precious Talisker.”
“That’s true. But not that. I was worried about… Well, I don’t know how to say this. I just don’t seem to do certain things…in a fastidious way.”
“Fastidious?”
Okay. So he didn’t know the right word. The delicate, ladylike word. “You know,” he said edgily.
“There’s a place for please and thank you. Maybe even a place for that language in bed. But I can’t promise any aptitude for…finesse.”